Farewell.

It's finally bye-bye career foundations. 3 hours of unbearable dos and donts of working in the business industry. It's definitely THE subject that makes me regret coming business the most.

Having not gone home for 3 weeks, i was welcomed home by a, " eh..who are you? Can you still remember the way home? "

stupid brothers. :)

I hate alvin's Nintendo DS. Everytime i head for home, i spend hours convincing myself to study. But all this will be put to waste with just a waive of his DS..just so he can feel good for studying while i waste my weekend away.

Distractions are a test to one's self-discipline. WHERE ARE MINE?!?!




I loved you.
Grey sweat pants.
No make up,
so perfect.

Mika

I am so glad i bought mika's album. At times when i'm bored ( which should not be happening), waiting for time to pass ( which still should not be happening ), i listen to mika's tracks or log on to youtube and re-watch those videos that introduced me to him. damn funny. And! He made dnd video look good too..

Anyway, Dnd's tonight. But the atmosphere isn't really there. Everyone's home. Hardly anyone here is going. Come to think of it, hardly anyone IS going.. 'cept for the usual few. Like how the girls put it, everyone's " JUST SIANZ " now..



So I smiled and tried to mean it,
To let myself let go.

Cos it's all in the hands of a bitter, bitter man.
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in.
Take a bow, play the part of a lonely lonely heart.
Say goodbye to the world you thought you lived in.
To the world you thought you lived in

5th Sept.

The new HAS system has brought about much politics in hall. Hall against hall, block against block, one clique against another. These politics never seems to cease and i wonder why. Don't we all belong as one? Or have the culture eroded to an extent that no one has control over it anymore?

The differences in everyone's character is clear. But does that really mean that everything has to be the way it is? Isn't there compromise in this world? Or are we all filled with the want to excel, to stand out among the crowd? Why is there this silent competition?

To be completely unbiased, i blame the HAS system. I blame man's selfish nature.

Everyone seems selfish increasingly.


Only students and already bugged by this. I really shudder to think what is in for us when we enter the working world.





Time stood still for you,
Forever at 15.
This little place called heaven,
is where you'll always be.

STILL and forever will be... much loved by many.

Impressions

Presentations, presentations, presentations!

I feel drowned in a world which requires us to talk, to convince, to persuade, to impress. I can't see myself, a couple of years later, standing in front of a panel of bosses trying to bring to them an idea that sounds completely nonsensical even to myself.

When i walk down the tutorial rooms, i see smartly dressed people everywhere. All ready to convince. All ready to fight. Why do i not have wills like them? They seem so sure of where they want to go, what they want to do with their life. What do i want from mine?

I can't see myself standing with such poise, such elegance, trying to carry off the 'standard business woman' look - capable, intelligent, smart. I am just not this.

Tell me why, again, am i here? What the hell am i doing in business? Who am i trying to kid? Why did i say no to something i wanted?

Only 5 weeks into school and i can already feel the pressures of exams. Have i always been like this all along? A nervous wreck who can never break away from the fears of being a failure once more.

The pressure is building up day by day. I want a rebirth. I want to set things right.

But how do i go about doing it?

Have i made another wrong move? I should stop looking back and regretting my steps and learn how to pick up the pieces instead. I should smile and take things in my stride. I should laugh at the face of presentations, seeing how much we've been drilled in itBut things are so often easier said than done. Whenever i stand in front of a crowd, i get tongue tied.

My mind's so filled with, " had i not done this ; had i not done that ; had i chose this ; had i chose that."

Presentations, presentations, presentations. I just hate them presentations.




And i don't want the world to see me,
Coz i don think that they'ld understand.

Pachelbel Rant

Reasons why we should hate Pachelbel's cannon in d.

Dreams.

To all bloggers out there, don't stop blogging. Coz once you stop, it's hard to pick it up again.

Thanks for all the tags..even though it had NOTHING to do with my posts..haha..but i'm glad that a potential class gathering is about to happen. yasa..hint hint.

The third week of school had zoomed pass again. Before we know it, we'll be hit with the great exam stress once again. Last week, when tutorials first started, the tutor from one of my classes asked everyone of us to self introduce, say what we're specialising in and talk about our future.. our ideal end in mind. I had about 2 rows of people before my turn yet when the spotlight was on me, i still could not give an answer convincing enough for myself, let alone other strangers.

What am i doing here?

After one entire year of education, i've finally realised that.. Business is so not my calling. This is not the path i wanna take, not the future i see myself in. I don't wanna be stuck in such a rigid, fake impression giving environment. It's too restricting.

Everyone in my class had dreams. Dreams of where they wanna go, what they wanna do. Although their dreams sounded quite the same, they were still dreams nonetheless. Of course, some of their dreams sounded rather impractical but what mattered was that they were willing to say it in front of a room of strangers. That's the first step.

Where's my first step?

I miss Australia. Melbourne especially. It's tranquility and all. How everyone there carried smiles on their faces and do not think twice about giving a helping hand. The problem with singapore is, everyone's too afraid to trust strangers. I'm a guilty party myself.

Was at Jurong East earlier today, queueing to withdraw some money. When my turn came, we realised that it was out of cash and there was a long queue behind us. Remembering that something like this happened in australia once and the people there were kind enough to let the rest of the queue know, we decided to let OUR queue know. So we approached this girl two person behind and went, " excuse me, this machine has no more money. "

Instead of thanking us, this girl totally took us as invisible, ignored us and continued queueing. That stupid ugly girl! So bloody rude!

seee, now u know why i miss australia. OK, it's far from utopia. But still, i can dream, can't i? =)

Hall FOC is over. I must admit i was quite slack during the whole camp. Sorry guys...esp chun how. Must've given u quite a no of probs. Thanks for being so understanding the whole time. =)

Tomorrow is going to be the first day of sch. I feel like a primary school kid all over again. The feeling of dreaded-ness overwhelms me. I hate school i hate school i hate school. It's undoubtedly so. As each sem passes, this sense of fear and hatred seems to not only not subside, but build up so uncontrollably, i feel like giving up on it. But alas, i'm too hum to do so. For i live in singapore... how else do we survive but study, study and study? Everytime my mother asks me to give up on my studies, I would burst out laughing - seriously, who will expect their mother to suggest this? But there are times where i would consider the possibility of doing so. Will it be better?

Guess what?! I finally got to cut my ugly hair! I didn't go to hot mama to cut coz it was too far away from school and I got a new hairstyle. More modern. I have mixed feelings though. I don't know if i can carry off this new hairstyle well coz it is quite different from hot mama's conventional cut. I asked the stylist to cut my sideburns shorter but he die die don't want. I think its a ploy. He wants to make me go back and cut my hair every week. Come on people, give me some comments! :)

I want the sony ericsson K810i badly.... anyone want to sponsor me?!

Tears and rain.

Everynight it happens.
Everyday it happens.

I'm so tired.
Really very tired.

And i can't get it out.

I see it.
It worked.
You can be happy now.
I'm there-
All you wanted me to be;
All you wanted me to feel.

Be happy.

For i'm no fighter.
Not without my 'oxygen'.

So scared,
so scared.
It's a scared scared situation.

High and dry.

So quick. It's my last night here in Australia already. It feels like it was just yesterday that i first laid foot in Perth, braving that 6 miserable hours of cold australia air just to wait for the first flight to Melbourne.

I must say, i have mixed feelings about returning home. 1-2 days ago, i was yearning to go home so badly because it feels really bad to trouble your relatives that much. But now that THE day is tomorrow, i'm kinda wishing time to pass by slowly.

I'm gonna miss winter, the friendly faces in melbourne and although not as good, Sydney as well. I'm gonna miss the animals here. Their zoo is much better than that of Singapore. But i'm definitely not going to miss thefood in sydney. Although i still gourge myself until i'm like 3 or 4 times the size i was, the food in sydney is still worst than the food in singapore. I'm gonna miss nua-ing in melbourne hotel, the stress free life and everythingelse.

OH! and of course, the company as well. There's nobody better to spend the hols with.

There's a small part of me which wants to go home too. But this part is puny. Not because i don't love singapore ( a patroit i am ), but because i simply hate school. And school starts almost immediately after i touch down. Not cirriculum exactly, but FOC. ( Looking on a brighter side, FOC may still rock but i better not get my hopes too high yet. ) I just hate the study school in general. Told you i'm not the study material.

This trip really squeezed me dry. i've used up every cent ( i think ) in my bank. AND the bad news is, this includes my pocket money next mnth. Sooooooooooooo, anybody wanna take care of my living expenses next month? :D

Oh ya, i might put some random pictures up. The rest, i'll load it up to picassa or smth when i have the time. Check it out if you still have my easy-to-rem old hp no. If not, ASK! heh. =)

Bye australia.

Goodday' mate!

In my uncle's place @ Sydney now! weather's @ abt 16 degrees so it's pretty ok compared to Melbourne where it was about 6 degrees. FREEZING!

Sydney's very much like singapore where the streets are busy, filled with overaged hooligans, honking cars and very little smiles. Melbourne on the other hand has the best people around. Everyone..and i mean EVERYONE was friendly. The service there was brilliant too despite them not charging us service charge. Very different from singapore. I know. Coz i'm in service. wahaha..

Pictures will NOT be up due to privacy rights. But if ANYBODY, who still reads this old...boring place and wants to take a peak at how stupid we are, drop me a msg, i'll show em to u.

Blog more when i get home.

Bye bye..

Paint a rainbow.


In 6 hours times, i'll be seated in a flight bound for Australia. Woo hoo! After 20 years, i'm finally really going there.

Anyway, i was reading up on some stuffs on the changi airport website and check this out:


New Guidelines for Liquids, Aerosols and Gels in Hand-CarrIED Luggage.

The new guidelines on hand-carried luggage are :
a) Liquids, Aerosols and Gels must be in containers with a maximum capacity of not more than 100ml each. Liquids, aerosols and gels in containers larger than 100ml will not be accepted, even if the container is partially-filled;
b) Containers must be placed in a transparent re-sealable plastic bag with a maximum capacity not exceeding 1-litre. These containers must fit comfortably within the transparent re-sealable plastic bag, which must be completely closed;

bla bla bla...

makes sense.

BUT...

Q1.What are considered Liquids, Aerosols and Gels?

Liquids, Aerosols and Gels include :
Drinks, including water and juices
Soups and sauces
Perfumes and deodorants (liquid or liquid-solid mixture)
Creams, balms, lotions and oils
Cosmetics such as mascara and lip gloss
Pastes, including toothpaste
Pressurised foams and sprays, including shaving foam, hairspray and spray deodorants
Gels, including hair and shower gels
Contact lens solution
Any other items of similar consistency


No water onboard flights.
wahaha!

Now that's a joke.

oh well, i guess safety first.

Bye Bye singapore!

Speak my language.

It's funny how it took me so long to start realising the beauty of knowing various languages / dialects.

It's been roughly a month since work started at fish and co and i've made friends with people from all over the world. There were Phillipinos, malaysians, indonesians, fellow singaporeans and of course, the predominated mynamarians ( from myanmar. ) Everyone have the habit of communicating in their own native language despite being constantly taunted by the words, " channel 5! channel 5! "

The managers will start talking in their mother tongue, the myanmarians will start talking in theirs. Even the malaysians will be consistent! Only we singaporeans will start yakking in a mixture of english , chinese, malay,cantonese, hokkien ( mixed with teochew. ) and the famous annotations of la, lor, meh, mah, hor etc etc etc. And it comes so naturally!

Many people have criticised these " singaporean slang ".. giving it a sloppy, distasteful image. Maybe these people are right. Sometimes, i guess we are ashamed of it ourselves..that's why many of us try to imitate angmohs in their slang and accent.

But what good is Singapore without its la-s, lor-s, meh-s and famous language rojak?

My phillipino colleagues love their language. My myanmarian colleagues love their language. My malaysian colleagues love their language. Only people like me thinks that chinese is disgusting. And i still do! i'ld die trying to have a dialogue in perfect chinese but ahh..when it comes to using specific chinese words to link up my sentences, i'm a pro. Except that i always use the wrongs words.

yes, i'm a chinese sucker. And i bet there are tons of people out there who are like me. That's why we use words from other languages to fill up the missing spaces in our sentences. It's called widening our horizons. hahaha.

I say singapore slang is good. Coz if we wanna bad-mouth others, these victims must not only know english, but must be able to comprehend chinese, malay, cantonese , teochew ( /hokkien) and sometimes, maybe a little japanese as well.

MUAHAHA!

That's why i say..

embrace our singapore slang.
It's what makes us.. UNIQUELY SINGAPORE.

Southern Sons - You were there

Tioman Dive.

Si, si.

I'm back from Pulau Tioman.

The diving trip was quite an experience i must say,

but i'm not sure if it's in the positive way.

Training sucked.

A major disappointment. Especially with hiccups occurring along the way. But when leisure dive started, things started to look a little brighter.

Went to Sakura to feast after coming back to singapore the other day and you wont believe how dumb the cashier was.

There was a brocheur ( however it's spelt ) that states that buffet's @ $22nett and a board that says $26++ inside the store. So i took the brocheur, went up to the cashier, placed the brocheur on the desk and asked, " what is this? "

The cashier then flashed me her most brilliant smile and replied..

" This is a flyer, mdm. "

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!
How dumb does she think i am?!

okok, i know i've been harping on this for quite some time alrdy.. BUT! WHAT KINDA ANS IS THAT?!

She's lucky she's not working @ Fish n Co. Let HQ hear, confirm die.

It's all about food, baby.





Yes, yes..i know. I haven't been blogging and this place is filled with virtual spiderwebs.. so here's a quickie!



Things have been pretty good at fish and co except for the nagging feeling that the managers are making use of us to do full timer's job for the pay of part-timers. Almost all the bosses came down yesterday, making everyone all jittery. These BOSSES probably have nothing better to do than to do regular spot checks, instill strict demands and ask really dumb question to gauge our competency. oh well, I can't complain too much.. They're the one supporting me financially now. wahaha.

Can you believe how food-crazy we've become? Just a couple of days back, 2 grown men came into the shop and ordered a mountain load of food without finishing any of them. The best part was, they ordered our favourite mussels in garlic lemon butter sauce and ate only like 2 mussels. 9-2=7. 7 untouched mussels were staring straight at us. This was too sinful. So............. ALL IN THE NAME OF RIDDING THEIR SINS, the both of us brought the remaining mussels into the kitchen and finished up what they had left. I know it's disgusting.. sharing 2 STRANGERS' saliva and all but........ someone has to sacrifice, right? hahaha...

Ended work early today ( thanks to our very good lying ) and we decided to dine @ citylink's " new york new york! "

ahh...yes. New york new york. Prestigious and stylish. I've heard people talking about how good their food are. And given how much our stomachs were grumbling during work, we were really looking forward to feasting.

But ALAS!

How wrong we were.

The food was horrible! We ordered some cuppacino mushroom soup thing, fiery buffalo wings, spring chicken penne thing and a bbq spare ribs. They were either toooo sweet or tooo tasteless. This is no exageration. The both of us cringed immediately upon the first mouthful of mushroom soup. We tried adding in tons of pepper and even salt to neutralise the sweetness but it was un-savable.

Went on to watch 'transformers' thereafter. It was REALLY GOOD! A die die must watch show. The graphics were incredible, the plot was the usual good V bad..but the scriptwritter was able to squeeze in ALOT of funny lines which sent the crowd bursting in laughter. So much better than shrek 3 and fantastic 4. No wonder the newpaper rated it 4.5 stars. DO NOT MISS IT. THE TRANSFORMERS. IN THEATHERS, 28 JUNE 2007.

A'right...i gotta run. Diving's tml and i have yet to pack. bye.

I have a dream.

To cast everything aside and care about nothing.
To live in the forever sweet abyss.
To not stay trapped and haunted.

Send me a bomo.


I have my dreams.

The dreams are these.

Fish and co, fish and co, fish and co, GO!

worked in fish and co for like 5 days. 52-ers came to celebrate estelle's birthday on the 2nd day. All i could do was pour water then.. cos i could not take orders yet.

There are lots of people from overseas working at fish and co. but they are very friendly even though sometimes there might be communication breakdown. I did the birthday rap twice yesterday and someone actually praised that i have good service!

Grace Kelly

Do I attract you?
Do I repulse you with my queasy smile?
Am I too dirty?
Am I too flirty?
Do I like what you like?

I could be wholesome.
I could be loathsome.
I guess Im a little bit shy.
Why dont you like me?
Why dont you like me without making me try?

I try to be like Grace Kelly,
But all her looks were too sad.
So I try a little Freddie,
I've gone identity mad!

I could be brown,
I could be blue.
I could be violet sky!
I could be hurtful,
I could be purple.
I could be anything you like.
Gotta be green,
Gotta be mean,
Gotta be everything more.
Why dont you like me?
Why dont you like me?
Why dont you walk out the door?

Tranquility before terror.

Everyone's msn's nick yells, " RESULTS ARE OUT! RESULTS ARE OUT! "
I rushed home with my mouth dry and head drenched with sweat fearing for what i'm gonna see.. but all that pops out is... " CANNOT FIND SERVER. "

cursed computer.

So while i spend yet another hr waiting for my turn to come and check, i thought i'ld just drop by to say...


employed..
ONCE AGAIN! =))

And as i quote.. " This time, a true job. " no longer are we tricked. We've got ourselves a legitimate deal. YEAH!

ok.. time to get back to reality..............................

Employed!
no longer..

damn.