Friday, February 29, 2008

:))))))


The Leap Year. :)
Still.

Still this nostalgia, still this confusion.
I think I really need to disappear for a while to sort out my thoughts.

This fight within is tearing me apart.
It's like fighting to see who can play my personality, my trait.

On one hand, the enormous ego-filled mean green machine. On the other, the guilt of making you pay for what you've done.

Hmmm, maybe i DO have a split personality.

Anyway, today and tomorrow's KL's big dance performance. It's been a while since i last saw her. Most (i think) of the class is going to be there. One non-class member is going to be there too! And she's finally going to introduce her boy to me. haha..

All the best KL! Can't wait to see you shake the law school down. :)





So why don't we go,
somewhere only we know.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

In spiderman 3, James Franco, the new globin had his head struck and lost his memory.
He looked so happy.

Sometimes i wish i was given a chance to get a clean slate. A new beginning - to right all my wrongs, to change who i am.

I hate days like today. Where i am brought into constant nostalgia, into thinking about things which i can't even recognise.

Jasmine says i'm starting to be the 'attitude' me again. Maybe i am. I'm sick of being bossed around, treated like i know nuts or that i'm totally kuku.

Most of all, i'm sick of 'fighting'. I'm sick of ur petty games.

It's time i stood firm. Stand firm with you and your 'pretty' friend.

Pride really makes one lose themselves. I'm sure it happened, happens and is happening to many. But i urge you, to somethings take a step back, and think.. " what if i'm not really the best in the world? ", " what you i'm just an old fool who thinks i'm superior, who thinks i'm in power, or who things i'm better than you? "

What if you're really not that good?

oh god.

sometimes, or most of the time, i'm sick of you guys.
And it's not only the girls. The guys as well. Or issit only you?

I'm sick of being hum.
I'm sick of being misunderstood.
I'm sick of wishing i'm the old yvonne.
I'm sick.. i'm sick.. i'm sick.. of everything!

And i'm hoping the same thing won't happen in ocip.

Like the saying of our great ol' MTT, " assumptions makes an ASS-of-U-and-ME. "
Never assume.

I have my reasons for doing things i do.

damn, i should really practice what i preach.

And games that never amount.
To more than they're meant.
Will play themselves out.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

那时,有福总于realised that, 原来不开口比开口好。

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

TIRED.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Relections.


This story may be familiar to some. But i'm gonna repeat it nontheless.

There once was a woman who licked her envelope so as to seal it. But while doing it, she got herself a papercut. A few months later, her lip became swollen and before she knew it, cockroaches were emerging out of her lips.

Unknown to her, the envelope had cockroaches eggs on it and they hatched in the woman's lips.


Now... to link it up to what i'm trying to say:

SOH FANG HUI PAPER CUT MY LIPS TODAY! guess how frightened i am.


On a completely different topic,

It's my emo day today. Emo not in the bang-the-wall-and-cry way but more in the silent reflections way. Weird thing is, if you ask me what i was thinking about, i can never answer it. Not because i don wanna share, but because i have no idea what was in my mind as well.

It's like....blank.

But at the same time, there's something there.

Something i'm not sure if i can't recall coz i don't wanna know or coz i really don't know. ( try to decipher this sentence. haha.. )

Whatever it is, sorry to those i have been weird/tempermental to, and advance sorries to those i will be in the days to come. Try to bear with it for a while.

I need some time.

Anyhow, ocip went to do hall-to-hall tidbits selling today and on the whole, i'm very much happy, pleased and thankful to have a team like this. But to some extent, i'm afraid too. Afraid that as the team gets closer, each others flaws emerge even more and our patience with one another gets thinner.

On the other hand, i'm afraid not because of this, but because i will miss them when the whole project ends.

Remember i once said i felt like i was smoking through my life? This time, it's different. Maybe because there are people who values this as well.. it makes me wanna do more. ( whether ppl can see that or not. )

I want to make this happen.

I want.. i want.. i want.. so many things.



And i don't know,
how to be fine when i'm not.
And i don't know,
how to make this feeling stop.


sidenote: Please pardon my terrible english. i'm really zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzy.

Friday, February 01, 2008

This must be how MTT felt.





when the dogs bite, when the bees sting. When i'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my favourite things, and then i won't feel...
so bad.