=)))))))


Together, forever,
with you.

Just for laughs.

This TVC was made possible thanks to: Tricia Teo, Terence Koh, Jasmine Lee, Yvonne Tee, Tan Tze Wei, Ang Hiang En, Jonothon Cheam and Amanda Ong!

Thanks alot guys. Really appreciated it. :)

very VERY sad to hear about what happened to Felicia..

RIP.

Whether you all believe or not,
i love ocip, i love my team! :D

One year ago.

I really don't know if i can push on anymore. No, i have to!

I guess all the recent hu-has have been getting to me.

To let Yixin go, even though we're not that close, is really harder to accept than i imagined. Not in the very emo way, but more like because i know i haven't done my part to make her feel part of the team.

But before i can mourn over it, i find myself transfixed in another position which really striked me hard. I know not how to describe the exact feeling. It's like all the negative emotions mixed into one.

I'm literally pushed off my feet now. OCIP.. it's really what i wanted to do. It's really what i felt for. But what u've said.. made me lose my footing. It changed the previous statement from present tense to a (possible) past tense. I can't seem to stare at any related activites, not thinking about what u've said. If after talking to you for so long and so many times since the start still makes u feel this away about ocip, then i really shudder to think what others may feel.

Is this really how ppl judge OCIP? or is it ur one-sided judgement just to put me down at the heat of THAT moment? I guess we'll never know.

Peilin always says " that was one year ago. "

Funny as it is, it's really true.

One year ago, 52 was so close.
One year ago, we never judged.
Now one year later, everyone has their own lives.

The sad part is, i've begin to feel more on how plastic uni is. One's own life is all what one thinks about.

I sometimes think if i'm reacting too big to it. But, i really can't bring myself to look at you and not remember what you say and did. Even those i recently made friends with know, what other acceptable reasons have you not to?


sigh.

To sum it all,
i'm utterly disappointed.


sidenote: OCIP NOT = LOVEBITES! now and never will be.

It usually takes me just a day to get appeased.

But up till now, i'm still pissed.

And i'm not going to hide it this time.

Maybe it's not enough. Maybe i need more.

I may need a really looooong, undisturbed zzz to ever recover from this.

:))))))


The Leap Year. :)

Still.

Still this nostalgia, still this confusion.
I think I really need to disappear for a while to sort out my thoughts.

This fight within is tearing me apart.
It's like fighting to see who can play my personality, my trait.

On one hand, the enormous ego-filled mean green machine. On the other, the guilt of making you pay for what you've done.

Hmmm, maybe i DO have a split personality.

Anyway, today and tomorrow's KL's big dance performance. It's been a while since i last saw her. Most (i think) of the class is going to be there. One non-class member is going to be there too! And she's finally going to introduce her boy to me. haha..

All the best KL! Can't wait to see you shake the law school down. :)





So why don't we go,
somewhere only we know.

In spiderman 3, James Franco, the new globin had his head struck and lost his memory.
He looked so happy.

Sometimes i wish i was given a chance to get a clean slate. A new beginning - to right all my wrongs, to change who i am.

I hate days like today. Where i am brought into constant nostalgia, into thinking about things which i can't even recognise.

Jasmine says i'm starting to be the 'attitude' me again. Maybe i am. I'm sick of being bossed around, treated like i know nuts or that i'm totally kuku.

Most of all, i'm sick of 'fighting'. I'm sick of ur petty games.

It's time i stood firm. Stand firm with you and your 'pretty' friend.

Pride really makes one lose themselves. I'm sure it happened, happens and is happening to many. But i urge you, to somethings take a step back, and think.. " what if i'm not really the best in the world? ", " what you i'm just an old fool who thinks i'm superior, who thinks i'm in power, or who things i'm better than you? "

What if you're really not that good?

oh god.

sometimes, or most of the time, i'm sick of you guys.
And it's not only the girls. The guys as well. Or issit only you?

I'm sick of being hum.
I'm sick of being misunderstood.
I'm sick of wishing i'm the old yvonne.
I'm sick.. i'm sick.. i'm sick.. of everything!

And i'm hoping the same thing won't happen in ocip.

Like the saying of our great ol' MTT, " assumptions makes an ASS-of-U-and-ME. "
Never assume.

I have my reasons for doing things i do.

damn, i should really practice what i preach.

And games that never amount.
To more than they're meant.
Will play themselves out.

那时，有福总于realised that， 原来不开口比开口好。

TIRED.

Relections.


This story may be familiar to some. But i'm gonna repeat it nontheless.

There once was a woman who licked her envelope so as to seal it. But while doing it, she got herself a papercut. A few months later, her lip became swollen and before she knew it, cockroaches were emerging out of her lips.

Unknown to her, the envelope had cockroaches eggs on it and they hatched in the woman's lips.

Now... to link it up to what i'm trying to say:

SOH FANG HUI PAPER CUT MY LIPS TODAY! guess how frightened i am.


On a completely different topic,

It's my emo day today. Emo not in the bang-the-wall-and-cry way but more in the silent reflections way. Weird thing is, if you ask me what i was thinking about, i can never answer it. Not because i don wanna share, but because i have no idea what was in my mind as well.

It's like....blank.

But at the same time, there's something there.

Something i'm not sure if i can't recall coz i don't wanna know or coz i really don't know. ( try to decipher this sentence. haha.. )

Whatever it is, sorry to those i have been weird/tempermental to, and advance sorries to those i will be in the days to come. Try to bear with it for a while.

I need some time.

Anyhow, ocip went to do hall-to-hall tidbits selling today and on the whole, i'm very much happy, pleased and thankful to have a team like this. But to some extent, i'm afraid too. Afraid that as the team gets closer, each others flaws emerge even more and our patience with one another gets thinner.

On the other hand, i'm afraid not because of this, but because i will miss them when the whole project ends.

Remember i once said i felt like i was smoking through my life? This time, it's different. Maybe because there are people who values this as well.. it makes me wanna do more. ( whether ppl can see that or not. )

I want to make this happen.

I want.. i want.. i want.. so many things.



And i don't know,
how to be fine when i'm not.
And i don't know,
how to make this feeling stop.

sidenote: Please pardon my terrible english. i'm really zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzy.

This must be how MTT felt.





when the dogs bite, when the bees sting. When i'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my favourite things, and then i won't feel...
so bad.

:)))))

Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.

Went to City Harvest for chilli crab today. It was NEATTT! Except for the 1 hr waiting time. -_-''





Yes yes, i know i should stop gorging myself. But good food are just so tempting..muahaha.

I'm really thankful for the great team i have. Working for OCIP is probably one of the greatest experience ( other than council ) for me.

Jas is probably really sick of me for saying this.. but i think i'm lucky and blessed. Like i've said, i'm a terrible team player in lovebites and it would probably be my retribution if i have ppl like me in ocip but nooooooooo, the people there are really responsible and helpful.

i guess i probably should stop saying it least i start jinxing it with my really really foul mouth. haha..

School has approached it's 4th week. And as usual, i'm starting to be packed with projects, tutorials and endless lectures. Well, maybe not endless. But the timings are really killers. I sleep on avg 3 hours a day and by mid day, i usually find myself stealing naps before whatever activities i have planned for the night.

Sometimes, it gets pretty exhaustive. i know i might regret saying this in future.. but things have been really satisfying. I hope i don't give up half way like i usually do..

Watched 27 dresses last night. It was not too bad. Way better than i expected. Can't wait for ' PS I LOVE YOU ' to start airing. But since there's time, GO AND READ THE BOOK PEOPLE! It's REALLY good! nice nice nice! :D

a'right. time to zzz. night all!

"I am not involved."

Xie taught me this phrase over the hols. I'm not involved, i'm not involved. In matters that doesn't concern you, say, " I'm not involved. " But as the semester proceeds, i find myself sucked into numerous amounts of politics. Most of which i really am not involved..but only needed to be used as a scapegoat.

I really should consider xie's advice.

Went home over the weekend and Alvin showed me his 'birthday book'. And it looked fabulous. Undoubtedly, Alvin has very good friends. And it only makes me realise how plastic uni is.

I guess in uni, it's everyone for their own. Looks helps. And these ugly but deemed pretty people are useless when it comes to friendship and sticking through thick and thin.

All right, i'm overgeneralizing. But i bet many people feels the same as me.

That aside, i'm very happy that things @ ocip are falling into place. Last week was really intense. Maybe most people can't see it..but she can vouch that i've been running all over the place. But that doesn't matter. For when i finish meetings and discussions with the various ics, i can literally see things falling into place. And deep inside, the flame's spreading.

I'm really excited for CNY. Although my family's kinda dousing all festive mood with convenience, CNY and christmas will still always stay at the top for the list of festive seasons i like.

SOME PEOPLE may find CNY music noisy..but i beg to differ. It gives me a nostalgic feeling. :D

KL's having her dance performance thing next week. it's her BABY. haha.. Yay! Really excited to go too!

goodnight all!

I used to love organizing events, love it even more if it's for a cause i like.
And i thought u were good.
I thought i'ld enjoy.

But boy, was i wrong.

If you're so great, stop putting up a show.
If you're so great, stop taking things for granted.
If you're so great, watch what you're saying.
If you're so great, this post won't be up.


GO EAT YOUR OWN SHIT!

sidenote: i'm not talking about ocip.